Ok, you don’t have to be a drug user to participate in this activity because all this exercise requires is a little heart, and I’m not talkin’ ’bout cardio *ba dum tss*. Now that I’ve mentioned it, I’m not really talking about exercise either. I just want you to read about how terribly underrated these movies are, dammit. Two of these make me proud, but one of them just gives me giggles until my face hurts.
Topping the list is the golden child, Dazed and Confused. Before I saw it, I was in it for the reefer, but after mid-twenties Matthew McConaughey told me how cool I’d be if I smoked weed — I was extra in it for the reefer. Dazed and Confused may have opened as a stoner film, but by the end credits, it had changed me for life. This movie is the perfect combination of ice cream and sprinkles — soft, light-hearted teen angst laced with little solid bits of truth, but not so much it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Now that I’ve laced up the shoes of a high school senior about to walk away from my childish things, this one hits where the heart is. In the words of Don Dawson, “I just wanna look back and say that I did it the best I could while I was stuck in this place, had as much fun as I could when I was stuck in this place, played as hard as I could when I was stuck in this place …”
I’m surprised I even brought myself to watch the movie for A Clockwork Orange, seeing how the book itself was a feat in comprehension Luckily, the movie wasn’t even a fourth as bad. A Clockwork Orange doesn’t make the cut for its plot (Even though it is wonderfully mastered I’ll save that for another day.), but simply its content. I watched the majority of this 1970s film, thinking “Why can’t I have nice things?” You’d have to see it for yourself to totally retain its artistic value, but let me just say I could live in the Korova Milk Bar. I’d even be content with cleaning toilets if I could just have the honor of sitting at one of those naked lady tables — but, before I go off praising all the furniture, I’ll leave you something to think about from Alex: “It’s funny how the colors of the real world only seem really real when you viddy them on the screen.”
Yes, you found it. Let’s wipe off the dust and briefly discuss the single most hilarious 1930s comedy film to hit the box off– did they even have box offices? Who cares. Reefer Madness is more than just a movie, it’s a strict advisory warning on the deadly dangers of America’s number one killer, marihuana, and it is NOT to be taken lightly. Reefer, the mastermind behind all of America’s most detrimental terrors; cancer, Black Tuesday, hell, probably even WWI. Ok, I’m done. I can’t keep up this facade with even the mildest notion of seriousness. The saddest thing about this movie is, they actually were being serious. The American public were expected to recognize the common side-effects of marihuana use, which included (but were not limited to) attempted rape, accidental murder, and intentional beating people to death. If you’re a cigarette smoker, consider yourself lucky.